Kitsch Dave and jobbing wine critic Jilly Goolden take time out from their day jobs to sit down and listen to four of this month’s new releases. Up for grabs this time are Darla Disc with Sunburnt Rain, Dreamer with Wind It Up, Steve Gilmore with Irrational Love and Kameleon with Sadness Of Rage.

Kitsch Dave: Ok then… Up first is Darla Disc’s “Sunburnt Rain”. I guess you’d call this trance. It’s very euphoric. Has loads of them ‘hands in the air’ type moments.
Jilly Goolden: Yeah. It’s very Ibiza. Very catchy. Did you take the Blue Nun out of the fridge?
KD: You’ve got the Blue Nun there! Where’s my glass?
JG: <<Hic>> Oh yeah, here, get this down yer throat!
KD: Cheers! Anyway, back to Darla, This has a nice squelchy bass line. The main synth riff is all over the place though – although I’m sure Darla knows this by now as it’s been brought up in every review so far…
JG: Indeed. This sort of effect usually works better with a softer pad type sound, and when it’s much more slowly. This gives it a kind of drifty feel.
KD: Drifty feel? I take it that’s a technical term…
JG: Oi! You only ask me here because I have such a distinctive way with words. It’s my job. Do I tell you how to scream pink power?
KD: Back to the track then… Do you want to do one of your Jillyisms?
JG: Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. I’m getting sunburnt on the White Island. The sun has set and a thousand topless sweaty men are jumping around with their arms in the air…

KD: Ok! On that note over to Dreamer with Wind It Up – made on Ibiza eJay, so that ties in slightly with Darla’s track.
JG: If you say so. Have you finished the Blue Nun? Go get the Black Tower!
KD: Is this the same Bass line as in Darla’s track?
JG: Ooo. I don’t know. It does sound similar. That squelchy sound you harp on about.
KD: How would you describe it then?
JG: Like a Hoover going through a flanger!
KD: <<Looks worried>> Ok… The lead synth is fun. Sounds like Tetris though. Very gamey.
JG: It’s happy and uplifting. It sticks in your head for days on end. That’s the trick eejit! You go to the record shop and ask for the one that goes “do do doot doot dooot” and they know which one you mean.
KD: I see. The breakdowns are fantastic on this, with the squelchy sound taking you out. Then the introduction of the catchy lead again.
JG: Yeah, but what about the early 90’s Italian house style piano bit at the end. That was inspired. Where’s all the wine gone?
KD: The piano was a nice touch. You’ve drunk all the wine. I think there may be some egg nogg in the mini bar.
JG: <<drinking from the bottle>> Mmm. It’s like being in another sweaty club. But different. Are you sure this is all the booze you’ve got?

KD: On to Steve Gilmore and “Irrational Love”…
JG: This is quite upbeat for Steve isn’t it?
KD: I think he does a lot like this. I tend to download the mellower ones as I can give more heartfelt reviews of music I listen to normally.
JG: So you don’t listen to all this banging dance stuff then?
KD: No, not very often.
JG: I thought your sort were well up for it. Every Saturday night go down to the “Sweaty Box” take yer shirts off and dance to this sort of stuff…
KD: No, not all of us. That’s just on TV Jilly. Back to Steve’s track. I wasn’t keen at first; It was such a change in style from what I’m used to from Steve.
JG: <<shouting from behind the mini bar>> But what do you think now?
KD: It’s taken quite a few listens, but I do like it now. It’s still a lot harder than most things I listen to, and it’s not something I’d go out and buy… it’s still a grower though.
JG: <<still behind the mini bar, but sounding somewhat muffled>> you’ve got to remove your self from the subject. This track is so crisp you could get a paper cut from it. The production is faultless and the use of vocals is breath taking. Just imagine what Steve could do with a real singer!
KD: Yeah, I know all that but…
JG: <<interrupting>> you see, it’s like me and my booze. I like good wines and tasty beers. I don’t like these new fangled alcopops because they look like screen wash. But I’ve just drunk a bottle of Meths and it was fine.
KD: Erm. Meths isn’t an alcopop. It’s Methelated Spirit. I use it to clean oil off things…
JD: But what’s that one you can buy? Metz? Meths? Maths? Ooo. My tummy… <<runs toward the door>>

KD: Finally on offer is Kameleon with “The Sadness Of Rage”. A very personal track inspired by certain events in his life recently. This is the initial instrumental version, hopefully we will be getting a vocal one soon. As daft as this may sound, you can hear sadness and rage in this track. The softer synths do have a melancholic feel to them, which creates a pleasing discord with the harsher keys. On first listen I thought it was a bit on the repetitive side (at 8 minutes long) and was gagging for some vocals. Listening now for the umpteenth time, it sounds different. Maybe it’s the mood I’m in. I don’t want to be sat at home on a Saturday night alone and I want to be snuggled up with a certain someone special, but alas no. I can see where this is coming from. The harsher synth lines are almost nagging at you just like sadness and rage does. They build up inside your head. You try to think of something else and for a few moments (during the breakdowns) you are at peace with your self. But these moments don’t last long and the sadness and rage returns… Only stronger.
JG: <<staggering back, looking sorry for herself>> What did I miss???
KD: <<puts hands on hips and rolls eyes>> Oh Jilly!